Dilip-Thangali Wedding: 2009

Evening Reception 06/05/09

THE HALL BY NIGHT

The evening reception was a big meet and greet. In general everyone who attended the wedding appreciated both the lunch and dinner served at the wedding. The reception does not have any traditional component to it. It just gives a chance for everyone to meet the bride and groom and for us to get to know each others families in the short time available.
For my jewelery I wore a diamond set my maternal grandmother presented me and a bracelet my in-laws gave me.
Some select shots from the evenings event. Thanks for viewing this blog and for those who want to view in chronological order start from the bottom up!

WITH MY FAMILY

WITH HIS FAMILY

ALL OF US SANS HIS BROTHER (AND HIS WIFE) WHO COULD NOT MAKE THE WEDDING

WITH MY PATERNAL GRANDMOTHER

WITH PRIYA'S FAMILY (WHO MADE IT ALL THE WAY FROM TUSCALOOSA AND PUNE)

WITH ROHINI AND NANDINI MY FRIENDS FROM UNDERGRAD

WITH HIS GRANDPARENTS

THE GRANDMOTHERS SHARE A LIGHT MOMENT

WITH MY MATERNAL UNCLE AND FAMILY

AND MY PATERNAL COUSINS

WITH HIS ENTIRE FAMILY (THE ONES WHO COULD MAKE IT TO CHENNAI)!

WITH HIS UNCLE WHO LIVES IN THANGALI (HIS LAST NAME IS HIS HOMETOWN). YOU CAN SEE ARPITA WHO TIED THE LAST KNOT OF MY THAALI IN THE PICTURE AS WELL!

WITH MY MATERNAL GRANDPARENTS AND SOME FRIENDS OF THEIRS

AND FINALLY THE COUPLE....

Some interesting post-thali pictures

My cousin helps with the puffed rice ceremony and for that my father gifts him a gold ring. I proclaimed it to be the most expensive bhel puri I had ever had, although I must admit that I am very close to Vishnu (my cousin) and we had a lot of fun together, before during and after the wedding. He was a huge help setting everything up and was also a witness at my wedding registration which happened shortly after the civil ceremony.

This is one in which I had a "child" in my lap. The child in question here is my again my cousin. I would have preferred a lighter baby perhaps but I guess you adjust with what you have. The concept was that we were praying for the opportunity to have kids.

These are truly interesting pictures. I don't know why I had to sit on Ashwins lap, but he is already so slight that I was extremely worried for his safety. Alls well that ends well. It was good training I suppose for when his daughter would sit on his lap for her wedding a looooong way off though!

Seeking the blessings of our parents. I lost count of how many times we had to prostrate in front of various elders. I feel we become thinner for the exercise...

This ceremony was the coconut rolling ceremony. Since Hindu marriages were child marriages to begin with, they were filled with several such games to distract the children and keep them occupied through the long ceremonies. I think though the concept of the coconut game was to emphasize the point of give and take. We simply had fun!

One of my relatives, gave us as as wedding gift, a picture of me as a baby along with my mom. We are all amused and this leads to a nice candid shot.

With his grandparents who are over 90 years old!

The bride and groom after all the gala and show.

The Thaali - Most important wedding ceremony

The final run up to the tying of the mangalsutra or thaali which is like the ring in a Christian wedding, begins with my father washing his to be son-in laws feet. Thereafter, I sit on my fathers lap and receive an offering of coconut and other miscellaeneous items from Ashwin. Finally he gives me a plate with a 9 yards saree that will be worn during the tying of the thaali. Now this saree should technically come from their house. However, in my case, the saree I wore before was the saree I got from their house and the saree I wear during the thaali ceremony is a saree my mom bought for me (certain interesting adjustments to tradition and insider notes :)). My father was very excited that I was sitting on his lap, although I was a bit concerned if he would be able to handle it. Anyways looks like either I wasnt too heavy or my father was a strong man, I will let you decide!

After accepting the "koora pudavai" which is what the saree in which I get married is called. I went upstairs where my mother's aunts very deftly helped me with my saree. While I know how to drape a normal 6 yard saree (like the one I am wearing until now) I dont know the first thing about tying a 9 yards. The 9 yards it turns out was much more comfortable and I believe it forced me to walk and stand lady-like, a task I find extremely difficult under usual circumstances!

This is Ashwin tying the Thaali. He ties 2 knots and the 3rd knot was tied by his cousin sister, Arpita.

"Oh you changed already? You look nice in this 9 yards!"

ANOINTING ME FOR THE EVENT

GETTING READY

In the above picture, you can see Arpita standing next to my mom. You can also see the video guy with the mic trying to get a clear recording for his video. He looks quite distraught that we are getting married!

TYING THE KNOT

AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER

Helping out Hapless Ashwin

Now my poor husband is only half Tamil and the archaic Tamil that the priests spoke was a huge challenge for him, so at most points I can be seen translating and making sure he was ok. This is why in several pictures he looks quite confused. Of course he is also a very austere man to begin with and to elicit a smile from him is quite the task!

While one can understand Ashwin's inability to follow the proceedings completely, I dont know why he seemed to have lost all motor skills as well! I am seen here helping with his chain and watch.

All this is not to say at all points I was very interested in the proceedings. There were several mantras throughout the ceremony, which the priest patiently explained as best as he could but after a while you do start to have ADD.

Oonjal

Once the Kasi Yatra was over we headed over to the swing where the ladies of my house cleansed Ashwin's feet with milk. There were atleast 5 women who did this, so as not to bore everyone I just chose a random one in which my father's sister is washing Ashwin's feet.

Thereafter starting with my grandmother takes out "sutti" which is essentially taking off the evil eyes. A little bit of turmeric rice is used for this purpose.

Some singing and then the final aarti

The happy decorated couple (is Ashwin really happy here, or just trying to be scary ??)

Kasi Yatra

This is right after the loving breakfast. This part not only cracks me up but I also think I don't get it completely, so if any of you readers out there can shed more light, please do for all our sakes.
So the idea is that Ashwin who has been a student all along (still is technically) has two alternatives before him, to get married to go away to Kasi or Varanasi as a pilgrim. Of course being the pilgrim seems easier (atleast at the outset, I wouldnt really want to be walking so many miles and eating berries and roots all my life when I could be heading to Miami!!) and so he heads off assisted by his uncle as usual, replete with umbrella, Sundarakandam (a chapter of the Ramayan for his reading pleasure, maybe to use as a pillow ??), walking stick, bamboo fan and all. Now who do you think purchased all the things he needs to go to Kasi - my mom and I ... now this has me thinking .. obviously we as a family are organising the wedding and are hoping it goes through, why encourage this pilgrimage by buying stuff to assist his yatra ? No clue...
Anyways as he heads out of the wedding hall, my father stops him and tells him about his beautiful and wonderful daughter (how true all this is is yet to be discovered!), and cajoles him into staying. Of course our man is already in love and is hoping there is no last minute glitch and that my father will indeed come to his rescue!! He did nt need much cajoling at all and was quote relieved he didnt have to undertake the ardous journey (Florida here we come!).
We exchange garlands and the deal is sealed. You can see my silly husband dodge a garland here, I feel like I should have just said very well then thank you and walked out at this point, but anyways I played along and it all ended very happily.